Ahoy, venture capitalists and brand evangelists! Welcome to yet another elaborate hobby from the mind of Andrew McCalip, where we've somehow convinced the internet that watching a tiny autonomous boat bob across the Pacific is peak entertainment.
Project Bob was lovingly crowdfunded by our magnificent Twitter community—every bolt, sensor, and adorable propeller paid for by the collective generosity of internet strangers who believed in our maritime madness. But here's the thing: our little oceanic ambassador burns through Starlink bandwidth like a tech bro burns through venture capital, and frankly, we're not about to let Bob cross the Pacific without proper champagne celebrations for each milestone.
Enter the corporate logo cash grab: Each latitude band represents 69 glorious nautical miles of prime advertising real estate. When little Bob heroically crosses into your latitude, your logo will be shamelessly plastered across the live stream for the entire world to witness. It's like Times Square, but wetter and with more fish. Your sponsorship dollars go directly toward keeping Bob connected to civilization and our team properly hydrated with celebratory beverages.
We're manifesting a future where Polymarket odds ebb and flow like the tides based on Bob's daily progress. We want to see millions changing hands daily as degens bet on whether Bob will navigate the next storm. We demand spectacle. We demand drama. We demand venture capital flowing like the very currents that carry our brave vessel.
So open those corporate wallets and let's turn the Pacific Ocean into the world's largest billboard. Because if we're going to send a robot boat across an ocean, we might as well make it capitalism's greatest maritime achievement.
May the winds be ever in your portfolio's favor.